Just Do It

"There's a new world for the winning. There's a new world to be won." This is my life a year and a half after graduating from the University of Georgia. This is my life a year and a half after starting the job I pursued and knew I would find success in. This is my life more than 800 miles away from friends and family I spent the first 24 years of my life growing to love. This is my life. And this... is my Kansas City.

When Lent began earlier this year, I decided to pick up a book given to me by two friends meant to mentor me as a senior in high school. This book, The Imitation of Christ, is one of the most humbling reads one can ever have - a kind of "kick you in the butt" type of book. More than 40 days... Each night came with a new chapter and a new chance to refocus. Each night came with a new chance to grow. Each night came with a new opportunity to work at conquering myself. It's the perfect Lenten read, and I needed it perhaps this year most of all. During this time, I took note of several passages that jumped off the page at me. One, in particular, became a sort of a silent yet profound battle cry for what I have been trying to strive for all along. "Grant what You will, as much as You will, when You will. Do with me as You know best, as will most please You, and will be for Your greater honor. Place me where You will and deal with me freely in all things. I am in Your hand; turn me about whichever way You will. Behold, I am Your servant, ready to obey in all things. Not for myself do I desire to live, but for You -- would that I could do this worthily and perfectly!" I mentioned it was humbling, right? I could stare at those words for hours and still not comprehend the extent of what they entail. Whether you have the realization of this being the only way to find a true sense of peace in a life otherwise devoid of it or not, this has to be one of the most difficult things to convince yourself of wanting. Regardless, those few lines brought me right here... to right now. And when presented with the opportunity to leave behind most everything I know, I needed to be sure I was making a sound, well thought out decision. This is the way I operate. This is my life after all.

I'm trusting my judgement. For those who do not know me well, I take a painstaking approach to get to that point. I'm trusting God. Those words... place me where You will... had to make me sure of my decision to leave, right? Hell no. Following through is always the most difficult part, though. Benedict XVI has a saying for a time such as this, "Do not be afraid. Do not be satisfied with mediocrity. Put out into the deep, and let down your nets for a catch." Nike also has a saying, "Just Do It." And I did. It's awesome... it's exciting... it's scary. What causes greater fear than the fear of the unknown? I'm not sure anything does. I certainly do not want to live a life of mediocrity, though. And now I have a chance to prove something to myself. While I don't think I will ever be completely fearless, I do want to live my life to the extent I can say wisdom and a mature faith helped me determine a particular action was much more important than my fear. In that sense, I want to live a fearless life. Consider me motivated.